1. Numbness: Often, this is one of the first experiences we have after the shock of a loss. In acute grief, this typically happens to help us survive and continue getting the necessary tasks completed after a significant loss. This can happen at any time during our grieving as well. At times, this may feel as though we are dissociating.
2. Isolation: While grief can feel isolating, it is also common for us to want to retreat and stay away from others. We typically do this because of the intense vulnerability that comes with grief and wanting to feel safe to not be vulnerable with others. Often, we feel frustrated because we feel isolated but also want to isolate.
3. Existential Questions/Crisis: After a loss, it is normal to question religious and spiritual beliefs and reevaluate previously held values and beliefs. These previously held beliefs may change as a result of loss.
4. Poor Memory, Lack of Focus, Disorientated: Our "thinking brain" goes offline during grief. It is normal to feel unable to concentrate, have difficulty remembering things, and feel confused.
5. Illness Anxiety: It is normal to suddenly have anxiety about your own or other's health and well-being. We naturally want to feel in control of preventing the risk of losing someone else or our own health. This can also lead to the physical symptoms of feeling that something is wrong when there is no explanation for the ailment.
6. Irritability: We feel more vulnerable and exposed during grief. This also means we are quick to anger or feel more sensitive about other's statements or support.
7. Physical Ailments: Grief can present as physical manifestations due to the intense emotions of the loss. It is common for individuals to experience tightness in their chest or back, fatigue, nausea, weight loss or gain, aches, and pains. Always check with a doctor first but know that grief may be the cause of these symptoms.
8. Mood Swings: All feelings are normal with grief. Anger, anxiety, sadness, relief, guilt and shame, regret, even happiness; all are common and normal. They often can be overwhelming and feel like they are coming from nowhere. These are typical "waves" that happen with grief.
9. Receiving signs/Feeling a loved one’s presence: Many people will experience “extraordinary events” or see/hear their deceased loved one. This does not mean that you have a psychological problem. Our brains are programmed to have a schema of what our world looks like. It takes the brain time to adjust and recognize the loss.
10. Feeling Stuck: There is no timeline of grief. Because of the discomfort of grief, we want to hurry it up or think we aren't going through the process fast enough. You are allowed to feel your feelings and need to in order for your brain to process the loss appropriately. It is normal to feel stuck in the feelings and thoughts related to the loss. Our brains need time to make sense of what has happened.
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